There is just something about repentance that stirs up the snow of joy in the globe of my heart.
I watch and grieve my children’s disobedience and see the pain that stabs, as they choose, willingly, to continue. They believe the lie that there is no other choice. They feed off of the lie, believe that they will win and that if they push harder they will have the certain thing they lust for. But all the while they know, deep within, that what they are doing is wrong. They know it with such clarity that they become ferocious in there choice to continue to sin.
Then… in a moment… they realize… by the Holy Spirit… whether by word, or by deed… on their own, or with a fellow brother or sister’s help… that they are being given, for no sane reason… grace.
Crocodile tears replenish the dried sockets from the death glare that they tried to stare me down with. A heart of sorrow and shame floods in and in a heartbeat they run towards me looking for a hug and comfort and that unconditional love they know from experience that they will find.
Words of confession and requests for forgiveness are uttered in passion.
Forgiveness is found and received.
Freedom is found.
Consequences do follow, but are met with big boy/girl underwear on and a determination to see the bigger picture – JESUS – and to take this as a lesson to learn from.
Three steps forward… stumble… get back up… four steps forward… stumble… get back up…. “God is holding my hand, I have His strength”. “I can do this… He at work in me.” “He loves me.” “He is never letting go.”
As I watch the swirling of snow… I begin to feel the warmth of the fire of the Holy Spirit and I see… this is also me… My story is just the same. He has given me grace.
I am walking… stumbling… getting back up… in desperate need of grace, and love, and mercy, and my Heavenly Father’s unfailing, unconditional love.
How grateful I am to be His child. What a gift it is to be able to run back to Him and to fall into His arms.
I’m so thankful that He made a way for me.
Jesus has so kindly extended me grace. Took my punishment. Paid for my sin… All of it… And…. He’s there holding my hand, protecting, guiding, leading, encouraging, and promising me… that He will complete His work in me.